First Day of School! Monday, Aug 27 2007

God it sucked…ok so first I get up at 6:30 and end up being ready half an hour early. Then I go down to the bus stop and my bus was thirty minutes late! So its already a bad day and so we pick up the other kids and head toward th school. Ok well our stupid bus driver missed the turn for the bus slope so she took a detour to get back and ended up half way across town. So I finally get to school and I go to my first class, which is choir. Well I walked in and half the girls in there glared at me and my choir director seemed really pissed at me. From that class I got: 10 sheets of forms to do tonight and a stupid homework assignment. Nice huh? Plus I was without my sissy until about ten minutes after I got to class DX. So I head off to Algebra. About ten minutes in we are released for the most boring assembly ever, during which I fell asleep. “Its a great day to be alive, and its a great day to be a Raider.” Ugh! So we’re released to third period then which for me is W. Geo PAP, which this class was fun. Then again…I am a history nut! So I go to Journalism/Yearbook which was fun too and so was lunch but Danielle and Ashley were talking about me, again!!! But me and Chelsea are good now again but I’m still mad at Josh…he’s just such a bastard. Our lunch was weird today due to ID tags so I only had about ten minutes of my French class with Victoria. English went by in blur and Science was fun. So, I go out and I’m totally flirting with my boyfriend and hanging with my sissy and my bus comes so I leave, not getting my goodbye kiss -.-* . So I’m on the bus and Jessica is blathering so I ignore her and focus on remembering my homework and listening to music. Well I’m almost home and I get asked the question if I masturbate (ew btw) and it makes me uncomfortable to talk about things like that and I got really angry for I was being targeted and everything. Finally after a few minutes Jessica distracted the guy who was asking. o yeah, my first day of high school at Wylie East High School.

“Its a great day to be alive and its a great day to be a Raider” *gags*

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New Videos again! Sunday, Aug 26 2007

two new videos in the Hannah series…
Plain – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_xeFTOs9×2s
There You Go – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fotM6ytwp4E

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Protected: Bad News, Good News, and Heart-break Tuesday, Aug 21 2007

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To My Guardian Angel (You Know Who You Are…) Saturday, Aug 18 2007

To my amazing best friend who I would give my life to in a heart beat, as long as she got to live.
“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart.”
-Helen Keller
I know one of the most beautiful things in the world is love, but it can’t be seen or touched. I believe that was one of the things she was talking about. You have shown me this unseen or untouched beauty time and time again and for that I am greatly thankful. You are the one I think about and worry about the most and you are one person that has done so much more then just be there for me. You’ve helped me though the bad times. Even though I had other help with the attacks against me, you were the first to say, “Look…leave her alone…she doesn’t deserve this.” You said I was more then you’re guardian angel and it touched my heart with never-ending love. “Because… Even if I fall, I know that you’ll catch me – an angel can’t do that, but you… you can.” The second you said those words my heart exploded with love and joy.
Expert from “You are all of this to me” by Melissa Collette
You are all I’ve wanted,
You are all I need.
You are all I’ve dreamed of,
You are all of this to me.

You truly are every thing I dreamed of in a friend, I love you so much Sis. You are also more then an angel to me, you’ve made me soar higher then the clouds, and also pulled me from the disaster that was my life. I really don’t know how I lived with out you.

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Why Am I Treated Like Shit!?!?!?!? Wednesday, Aug 15 2007

I just got another message from the group…this time from my ex-boyfriend, whom I still wanted to be friends with…I am now in tears…and when my boyfriend finds out it will be bad…but this is the message:

I have 2 tell u if u havent seen I blocked u from my myspace and another than dont talk 2 me mel ashers or chalsea any more

bad spelling and all…
As a happy note: I’m cancer free!

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New Video! Tuesday, Aug 14 2007

This is for all of my ’sisters’. Hannah, you make me feel so special and loved, you treat me like a real sister. Victoria, you’re someone I turn to and I know you’ll hug me while I cry. Jessica, I can always talk to you and you’ll listen and give your input. Cindy, you’re someone I can complain to and you won’t tell me to shut up and even though you’re the shyest one, you are probably the most crazy and you make everything, even tests, fun. I hold all four of you so close and I never want to lose any of you.

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I feel so special, loved, and blessed Tuesday, Aug 14 2007

I might have to go get checked for cancer and I already have three people praying for me, and it makes me so happy to see people care about me. Last night I was talking to my best friend/sister and she said a few things that made me tear up with happy tears:

“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(Amanda… I’ll be praying for you.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(I was so scared to tell you…I dont want to hurt you Nita…I didnt want to upset you)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(Don’t worry. I’m more worried about you. *hugs*)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(*hugs* I’m so scared)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(if its skin they can just remove that part….but what if its breast or lung)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(Don’t worry… You’re in my prayers.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(*smiles* thank you sissy)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(It’s nothing. And I have faith that God won’t let such a talented girl like you die so young.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(nah…I dont think He will either)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(and I’m not that talented…)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(my dancing is mostly faking the move…)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(Illnesses are the devil’s work, Amanda. And as long as God’s on our side, Satan’s tricks can’t overcome you.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(I really need to do this video…you and everyone who has stood by me deserves it)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(And you are talented. You have an incredible voice, you’re a brilliant photographer, your writing is phenomnally inspired… Amanda, you’re an amazing girl. God won’t let you die.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(*smiles as happy tears roll down my cheeks*)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(*hugs you*)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(*hugs tightly*)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(to be honest with you…Melanie had stolen my voice…you brought it back…)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(*hugs tightly* Don’t worry. Everything will be okay… I, and God, won’t let Satan get you.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(*smiles*)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(you know…sitting here…my stomach doesnt hurt…has it finally stopped after three months…usually its unbarable…maybe you’re right…I’m incredibly blessed…)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(You are. *hugs you*)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(I still need to get my moles checked though…)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(*huggles*)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(Yeah. But… I trust that God will help you.)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(*huggles*)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(it wont be that bad if I have skin cancer…they can just remove the skin from those areas infected)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(Yeah.)
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(plus it might just be because my moles are odd…)
“Imperfect Girl” Hannah says:
(It very well could be._
Crystal: Now it’s war!!! says:
(yup *smiles* I honestly think you are my guardian angel Nita)
And her boyfriend is praying for me too…which makes me feel really special. She wrote me a blog post and its at: http://wintergraphics.wordpress.com/2007/08/13/falling-back-on-god-and-a-prayer-request/

 

I feel so blessed to have so many great friends who care about me so much!

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Why am I such a monster?!?!? Monday, Aug 13 2007

Right now, I’m in tears. I totally blew up at Jessica this morning…making her leave upset at me. Here’s what happened:

4:00 am – Sister come and wakes me up to try and find out what to put on a rash
4:05 am – I tell her to go away and let me sleep due to the fact I was already cranky
5:00 am – Still awake from her bothering me
6:00 am – Still awake
6:30 am – Finally fell back asleep
9:30 am – Wake up again, fall back asleep
10:00 am – Get my ass out of bed
11:00 am – Went back in my room because I’m tired and cranky
12:05 pm – Jessica comes over, the doorbell having woke me up and I blow up at her being the cranky monster I am
12:35 pm – Jessica is still sitting in the rocking chair while I calm down
12:40 pm – Jessica leaves
12:50 pm – I have to go reconnect to the internet
12:55 pm – I start crying when I explain what’s wrong to my dad
Current time: 1:06 pm – I’ve been typing this and crying

I’m such a monster…</3

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What the freak did she do!?!? Sunday, Aug 12 2007

Ok…that was scary, I just went on to my friend Azalie’s myspace and she cut her freaking hair…she looks like a man!!!!

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Score three for the pack Sunday, Aug 12 2007

We got Melanie back finally…turns out she denies that she’s jealous of me and that she wants to bury the hatchet…it doesnt seem that way though seeing as I get new things from them once a week if that…but still its a bit much, well Raene got her good on YouTube by sayng her style of fighting was lame, nice huh? XD right now Hannah is probably dinging her too so there might be a new post

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